this is for all you stupid people who don't believe in teenage love♥ you know when you finally meet that one kid, and everything is just right? well i met him, but alotta people have been doubting me. so right here, you're going to know the truth behind everything i've been feeling. here goes,(:

i've liked him for six months, not too long, but just the perfect amount♥ i dated him on and off for about two months. i got cold feet and called everything off. i'd drive around in his trucks, just as friends, until that goodnight kiss that would always win my heart over. alotta people ask why i like him, he's a player, a jerk, a wannabe superstar; well i like him for what he offers me. he treats me right, with alotta respect. he treats those whom deserve it with alotta respect. he walked into my life the past few months when i felt everyone was walking out. he hugs me and hold me in his arms until everything is okay. he makes me feel weak at the knees and like i'm taking the biggest risk in my entire life, but i feel safe whenever i'm with him. i can trust him with any secret i've ever had or will have. i'm like a little kid and he's my candyshop♥ whenever i'm feeling scared, i call him and he stays on the phone with me until i fall asleep. he's like my best friend and my love all wrapped into one. i honestly don't know what i'd do without him most days. i know he has a past, and i'm not going to judge him for it. i know the things he's done, and still does, that doesn't bother me. i doesn't matter that he's older and lives far away, i trust him. he's the one kid that can give me butterflies in my stomach and make me smile, no matter what♥ i am madly in like with him, and i don't need your seal of approval(:

I don't know about you, but I've never been so exciting for a movie before(: I have fallen in love with the books, with the movies, and the characters. After almost 10 years of reading the books and watching the movies, you feel like you know the ways of Hogwarts and the lives of Hermione, Ron, and Harry. JK Rowling is absolutely amazing, and I probably won't ever be able to get over it. I'm just saying, but Ron has gotten super sexy for a red-head(: Harry on the other hand, he has seen better days.
Oh Harry Potter, I love you so much.

Ha. Someone please explain to me what I'm going to be doing for the rest of my life. I love this picture because it just reminds me of freedom and happiness. The sun shinning down on James, and him just smiling and having a good time. I miss having no worries or cares, just living life as it comes along. That's getting harder with the growing responsibilities of every day life.

Simple Things of Everyday Life:
Hakuna Matata;
it means no worries(:
Bravestrong;
it's the motto of the year(:
Just Sing;
copeland sung, 'sing with your head up, with your eyes closed.
not because you love the song because you love to sing'(:
Believe;
in yourself and your beliefs(:
Love;
everything in your life(:

Good things are there when you don't need them, and gone when you do. Live life as it comes, and let it take you where you need to go. Don't ever hold back, just let it all go(:

The Buried Life, its pretty much changed my views on my bucket list. I know I can't go and do all the crazy things they do, and travel across North America, but I can make my goals. I just want to do something that will change my life for the fun of it. I made my own list, and it's not as long or as crazy as theirs, but it's what I want to do(:

Go on a skydiving date♥
Take a summer long trip to South Korea♥
Ride a motorcycle or spend a day doing motocross♥
Bungee jump head first above a pool♥
Buy a bunny, name it Charlie, and house train it♥
Find a profession to help kids♥
Buy a Charm's City Cake♥
Get a tattoo on my right forearm saying, 'Music is an outburst of the soul'♥
Walk up to a sexy stranger, kiss him, and walk away♥
Go to a World Cup soccer game♥
Play Hide 'n Seek in Ikea♥
Fly in a private jet plain♥
Make-out with an extremely hot black guy♥
Have every living relative of the Koga family in a room♥
Live on the streets for a week or longer♥
Go to Haiti or a 3rd World country and make a difference♥
Spend the night under the stars with my closest friends♥
Get so crunk I can't remember anything♥
Engage in a giant slip 'n slide♥
Adopt an African American baby, an Asian baby, and a white one♥
Drink, drink, drink. Puff, puff, pass♥
R O A D T R I P ♥
Cut, style, and define my hair epicly♥
Kiss in the rain♥
Score two goals in a soccer game♥
Paint balloon fight in all white♥
Watch all my favorite movies in one sitting♥
Fall asleep in a boys arms, who I care deeply about♥
Have a 'Hangover' weekend in Vegas♥
Live in Oregon for a least a year, if not the rest of my life♥
Graduate high school and college♥
Achieve a 4.0 in my school career♥
Write my own song and somehow preform it♥
Attend John Mayer, Joshua Radin, Michael Buble concerts♥
Learn to wakeboard and do some sick tricks♥
Go shopping in New York and buy 100+ dollar jeans♥
Buy a puppy, and love it with all my heart♥
Create a pyramid of cans in my college dorm room♥

One day, I'll finish this list. I'll add more, I'll cross more off. My life isn't going to revolve around this list, but it's going to make me a more experienced person. I'm going to feel stronger for accomplishing the things that I want to do, for believing in myself.

Summer'10 is where it all began.♥
I could have told you from the beginning that this summer was going to be different, we were going to start something that we could never turn back from. The memories of this summer will last forever, and I don't ever want to forget a single person or time we spent. The kids in my life right now, are changing my life and I love them for every moment they've given me.(:
Abby Jensen, Alyson Clay, Hannah Bright, Marissa Rigdon, Nick LaSalle, Michael Gubler, Forrest Cloward, Alex Fawcett, Zac Muir, Griffin Taggart, Jonathan Pilling, Kengo Adachi, Matthew Minaga, Kira Joko, Kayla Watanabe, Monet Watanabe, Alec Weeks, Juhyung Hahm, Travis Woolston, Jeffrey Barnett, Lexi Devey, Sarah McIntosh, James Weaver, Gary Wheeler, Jacob McIntosh, Jacob Eiting, Kenzie Clark, Josue Cabezas, Justin Peterson, Courtney Powers, Mike Brown, Christian Forbes, Brock Lance, Cassidy Brewer, Garold Wood, Patrick Oberg, Jacob Cutler, Caleb England, KC Fife, McKay Luker, Junny Jeong, Jesse McDonald, KC Fife, Kelsee VanSickle, Tevin Byington, Grey Murdock, Justin Barber, and anyone else that I can't think of at the moment.
You kids mean the world to me, and without you in my life.. My life would be so dull. I'm excited to see where life takes us, to different schools, different friends, different colleges, different everything. I know for a fact that things are going to change through these next three years of high school, but I am going to always smile when I look back at this summer and see how happy we all were. Thank you for making an impact on my life, thank you for always being there for me. Thank you for being you.

Lately I've been listening to music more than ever. it has always helped me come back down to Earth and realize that I do have an amazing life. Usually my play lists consist of calming music, anything with meaningful lyrics. Never once have I really loved rap, but this past month, I've fallen in love. Eminem has changed my out look on life, through his music, through his life history, and everything about him. He's gone through so much in his life. His background that I read about changed my view on him.. I thought he thought up a lot of the stuff he wrote, from his views on the world.. But if you look at his lyrics, his background life, everything about him.. He's probably one of the most inspirational person. His newest CD is all about him becoming clean, for his daughter, for his adopted kids that you never really hear about. He's an amaazing guy, but no one ever really sees him that way. They see him as a drug addict, someone with an alter ego that he can't control, but in the end he was doing it for his family, for the people he loved.. And for that, he'll always be one of my greatest heroes.

i love backstabbers.(: you think they mean the world to you and then they turn there back on you and never say another word to you. you're always there for them, through all their shit. obviously that doesn't matter anymore. if you hangout with the wrong people, don't agree with them on just one simple thing, that means you're a shitty friend and you don't deserve their friendship. well baby, guess what.. i don't love you anymore. i don't want to be your friend if you're going to do that. if you're going to have drama in your life, stay the hell away from me. i've got better friend, people that actually give a shit about me.(: so suck on that one, hun.

Today is Father's day.(: I love my daddy. He's pretty swell if I do say so myself. I'mma miss him while I'm in California this week. We don't always get along, but he'll always be my dad. And for that, I'll love him till the day I die. All my life he's be there for me, no matter how much he worked, no matter if he was trying to do his work, no matter if he was in a good mood or not. As a kid, he was someone I always looked up to. He was the superman in my life, him and my brother.(: They meant the world to me. I remember my father was doing some odd schooling and he studied for his tests locked up in his room. I'd slowly sneak my way in and give him a magic spell so he'd do well on his test. He'd call me later that night after he found out his result and he'd tell me he always did good.(: It always made me smile to know that I sorta did something good for him. I love the memories I've had with my daddy. I love him so much.(:

"I believe that everything happens for a reason. People change so that you can learn to let go, things go wrong so that you appreciate them when they're right, you believe lies so you eventually learn to trust no one but yourself, and sometimes good things fall apart so better things can fall together."
-Marilyn Monroe.
Today was the hardest day I've had in a while.. I don't know why, but memories of people I've loved and lost flooded my mind. I smiled at the memories we had, but cried of the thought I can never have times like those again.. I've never wanted to see old friends so badly. Never wanted to spend more time with my brother and friends so much. I've seen people leave my life faster than I can realize what's happening. People get taken away from you when you need them the most, or when they're at their finest. I always here people say, "You never know what you have until it's gone." I never really got that until the past few months. I knew it sucked to loose your favorite toy or have your best friend move away.. But if you lost that toy, you'd eventually replace it.. You could call your best friend whenever you missed them. With people you truly loose, you can't call up to heaven and ask to speak to them. Once they're gone, they're gone. And days like today, I wish I was gone just to spend time with them. I want to there with them so I can remember what it felt like to have their love in your life.. Replacing a toy is a lot different then replacing someone's love in your life. They took a piece of your heart when they left, and you're never getting it back.

Remember those days when everything was just, easier? The only problem we had was when kids wore down our favorite colored crayon. I'd love to go back to those days, when everything was just easier. Last night though, was one of those nights.(: I felt like such a kid going to see Toy Story, and I liked it. I want to see all the little kid movies Despicable Me.(: That movie looks freakin' cuuuute. "IT'S A FLUFFY!" Awh, that girl is adorable. Seriously though, Toy Story 3 was epic. Probably the coolest movie ever.(: I will most likely go see again sometime soon, but who knows. I woke up about an hour ago, and I'm still tired. I shall go take a nap, goodbye.(:

Toy Story 3 Comes Out Tonight.♥

I've waited so long for this day to come.(: Eleven long years since the first one. I don't even understand why I'm so excited. Tonight till 3am partying. I adore Woody and Buzz, they're so close but they're so different. It explains the world of friendship so well. I just want to be able to fly and have living toys that go behind my back and screw up my room. That would be intense, I always did believe that happened when I was a child. This is going to be the most intense 3D show for me, like ever.(: I just can't hold in my excitement, it's insane. Arggggh.

I always did love Slinky.(: He was just so cool with his massive flexibility and all that fun stuff.

I forgot to mention what I've realized this past few days.(: My future in my eyes is becoming more and more clear. I'm sure it will change and I'll later become more confused, but as of right now I'm ready. I want to help kids. I know that leads to a large spectrum of different job options, but I've narrowed those down too.
-Counselor.
-English Teacher.
-Court Appointed Special Advocate.
-Social Worker.
Random career choice, but I've always loved working with kids. I know I have three years of high school ahead of me, but it will just help me choose classes and work through my years. I'm ready to do something important with my life. I'm ready to show the world that I'm something different. I've always said I wanted to change the world, and I think helping kids is one step towards that. Young kids are our future. They're the ones that are going to change the world, and without someone there to help them, someone to love them, they're going to have a hard time reaching the top. And with any of those four jobs, I believe I can help them reach the top. In my mind, that's all that matters.(:

Every word you say, I think I should write down. Don't want to forget come daylight.♥

-Joshua Radin.

I love how a single song can explain a million wor
ds that you want to say. Paperweight is officially my song of the week. Every time I listen to it, a different emotion comes out of it. Justin Bieber has become a new favorite of mine with his That Should Be Me song and his One Time (My Heart Edition). I always doubted his talents just because when I first heard him I thought he was a girl. When I listen to those two songs I find something so much better. The kid has talent, and I'm jealous.

When people ask me what makes me feel the most alive, I simple answer [[photography.]]

I'm saving up for a new camera. I have to save up enough for half, and my parents will match it.(: I've realized that I don't want my future to revolve around photography. I want to keep it as a hobby, a passion. If you turn something amazing as taking pictures into a job, it looses my interest. I lost interest because when I talked about it, the conversation always led to how it could be my future, how I could create something for myself. Yeah, I want to do something amazing with my future. I just don't want something I love to become a job, that I have to do whether I want to or not. And photography will always be something I love.

My future babby.(: Nothing too fancy, but I love♥

summer time.(:

School's Out, Summer's IN♥

First week of summer has officially began.(: And if this summer is anything like these past four days, this is going to be the best summer, ever<3 I love you everyone I spend my nights with, you're amaaazing. My friends I've made, the ones I've grown a stronger bond with, you're the ones that keep me sane. I can't wait, two weeks I'mma be in California for a week. After that, I head off to Oregon, then Seattle.(: In between all that, I'm going to party.(: I'm going to party like I've never partied before. This is going to be an experience of a lifetime. After these amaaazing three months are over, I start high school. Doesn't sound that great, but I'm damn right excited. New people, old friends going to the same school.(: I'm excited, but so anxious and nervous.

And the days go on,

The past three days I think I've got a total of eight hours of sleep. I'm got too much shit running through my head, and I can't handle it. Another three days of getting my heart hurt and shattered into a thousand pieces is really nice(: I've never had so much sarcasm in one sentence before. I'm sick of boys and their stupidness, really. Most of them need to grow up, stop messing up their lives with alcohol and weed and just deal with the reality of life. Polluting your body with that junk doesn't make anything better, believe me, I've tried. The past few months that's what my weekends have consisted of, fucking up. It's nice, ain't it.

I love you, so much.

I've been watching my friend go through so much shit and slowly fall into a deep hole of nothing. I wish there was something I could do, but I don't know how to fix it. I love the kid to death. I can't help them because they won't except my help. All this pain they're feeling makes me want to give them a hug, but I don't want to give them all this pity love. A lot of people think that they're faking it, but I dont' think it's right to call a bluff on someone who is going through a lot of pain. I want to get them back to normal so they can feel better and I can be myself around them. I miss our conversations over nothing, and just hanging out talking about they're favorite bands and how they love to play their instrument. I hate how one person can effect your life so strongly, and if they don't feel the same way.. Your life is altered and you can't seem to fix it. I just want my life and their life to be the same as the good ol' days when everyone was happy. I love you, kid. I'm always here for you till the day I die(:

M e m o r i e s, < 3

I remember the days where everyone was so calm. Everyone had their high standards and planned on keeping them. Now, you look at everything you once believed in and realized you shot it down to hell. Drugs and alcohol used to never be around in this safe town, the town where everything is perfect and under control. This is a city that's supposed to be a place for lots of babies, and a giant family. This isn't the place for danger for drugs, for anything illegal to ever be done. You realize, even when you wouldn't suspect it, that there are people around you doing all sorts of shit. You realize they're smoking weed, they're drinking underage, they're running off to secret places to do only god knows what. You realize you've fucked up your life and you can't turn back. It's hard to find people with the same wants and need that you are feeling. You can't figure out whether or not you can just turn your back on the people you give a shit about and try to move on. The world has changed from the 70's or even the 90's. It's crazy to think that all I wanted by the time I was at this age was my first kiss. And I look back at my history and I've had my fair share of 'first kisses.' I just never would have pictured myself in the life I'm living today. I wouldn't have pictured that I would be surrounded by the people that are in my life at this very point. I love them all, but sometimes I wonder if they're the best thing for me. I don't know if I can just walk away though..

I miss the days when we used to be so close. The way I could talk to you whenever I was feeling down, or just when I felt the need to. I miss the way I could run up and give you a hug, and you'd make me feel safe. I miss how close we used to be. I hate that you left me for those stupid other people. I hate how you just dropped me like I meant nothing to you. Our friendship was almost as important to you as a penny in the middle of the street. You just don't care anymore. I just tried to fix it, I tried to talk it all out, but you just pushed me away. I tried to let you go in my life, but you kept getting mad when I wouldn't give you the attention you wanted. I'm sorry that I'm trying to move on, but you won't let me. Everything we've ever been through was a waste of a memory space.

I love weekends,

This weekend has been an interesting one. It's crazy to think that this year is almost at its end. Ninth grade has been very adventurous, with memories I'll never forget. These past two days have really made me realize I have the most amazing friends in the whole wide world(: I would like to just say I love Zac Muir, Alyson Clay, Abby Jensen, Christian Forbes, Michael Brown, Bryson Rasmussen, Michael Gubler, Griffin Taggart, Jon Pilling, Jeff Barnett, Alec Weeks, Conner Jensen, Zak Call, Alex Fawcett, Patrick Oberg, Justin Barber, Matthew Minaga, Wyatt Peters, Nick LaSalle, and everyone else I just can't think of. I adore all these kids, very much(: You make my life so interesting, and keep it very exciting. I plan on keeping you all in my life till the very end. I love you, I love you, I love you(:

I love you,

You know how you feel like you always have those people in your life whom you know you can trust. Whom you feel like you can confide in them with whatever you're thinking. It's like they're a part of you, and you don't know how it happened, but you're glad it did. These two girls are the people I confide in the most. They're the the two people that I know I can trust. The people I can show my weakest self to. The people that know me better than myself. They're my two best friends, my two sister-like best friend. I've known them for less than three years, but I feel like I've known them for my entire life. We've been through so much, and I don't know if I could have made it through it without them. They're the people I don't want to loose, ever. The true facts about life, is we loose people. And through the next few years I might have to face the facts that we won't be the three best friends that anyone could have..